Letter to Mrs. Laura J. Little, Sheffield, Berkshire County, Massachusetts, from Lucinda Curtis, Westmoreland
Westmoreland Oct 12th /46
Dear Cousin
I gladly improve an opportunity of writing to you knowing that you will be solicitous to hear from me I shall there fore speak unreservedly and perhaps unconnectedly – for I am suffering from Neuralgia in my face and head which has continued already for several days, From the medicine Chapman gave me I find no relief as I have none for that particular complaint. I applied to a Physician here who sent me Morphine with orders to keep still – his Anadyne affords only temporary relief – And not knowing where I can procure assistance, find it very difficult to remain quiet [–] O how much I feel the want of some kind friend who would both assist and be company for me [–] the latter I need as much or more than the former. My heart sighs continually for some kindred spirit, some female friend to sympathize in joy or tears — Be assured I retain the liveliest recollection of your kindness to me while in S. it was indeed a balm to my deeply wounded heart. “An Oasis to me in Lifes dreary waste” —
How much happiness is sometimes confered by a word! A single look or tone of kindly recognition will oft-times do much towards soothing the anguish of bereaved hearts causing them to feel there are hearts still beating in unison with their own – I may be too keenly sensitive to the coldness or apparent indifference of those I had supposed friends, but I believe none can more fully appreciate any act of disinterested kindness – or any memento of continued attachment and regard – I speak the sentiments of my heart when I say I have never given any one my fullest confidence and in any one instance ever known any diminution of friendship or kindly feeling – on the contrary, they have risen in my estimation and affection –
My mind reverts at this moment to the few chosen associates of my childhood They are not near me now (would that they were) and some of their “paths have wound far far away” and various have been their destinies Portraying most clearly that this life is a changing scene, but deep within my inmost heart their memories are enshrined I love them all and often O how often recur to days gone by. Now I seldom see them and their voices no longer fall upon my ear in cadences of gladness calling up the best feelings of my nature – One has found a home far on towards the Rocky Mountains, Much of sorrow he has known but “Onward” is still his motto, he was but a cousin tho, he ever acted a brothers part — Another has gone to the “sunny South” but its skies to her have not been cloudless she married unhapily and much I fear her two sensitive heart is well nigh broken. Three remain in my native town – moving down lifes current smoothly and happily – One of them I am daily expecting here and very impatient am I to greet her for she is the kind and interested friend of my whole life Two have gone towards the Frigid Zone, yet the heart of one at least is still warm, if I may judge from the tenor of three letters successively received urging me most earnestly to come with my children and spend the winter in her family – their Residence is in Watertown a most delightful village but its vicinity to Ontario I fear would render it unsafe for one predis[posed] to Pulmonary Complaints – I do feel an inclination to comply with her request I am so lonely here and I do believe it would be cheaper for me to board – unless my health improves so as to enable me to get along with my work more easily – I suffer less from the pain in my side than I did in Sheffield in other respects much the same, I do wish you were here Dear Cousin it is so much easier for me to talk than to write
Mr Stoddard has finally concluded to take our school had he not done so the Trustees seemed quite disposed to have Elisabeth teach I feel quite disappointed for I had thought much of having her company through the winter Give her my love and let me know whether she designs teaching there, Jane is very healthy – she will go into school in a dew days. Alden seems pretty well. he remembers his Cousin Mary Little and I think would be glad to have her here to play with him, he is quite busy now digging our potatoes, picking up butternuts &c, Our friends here are well, Mary’s little girl excepted she is troubled with a hip complaint I am getting weary, and the pain in my head is quite severe therefore I must close, I have written on hurriedly, and I fear you will not be interested, but I feel anxious to send you some communication Do write to me my friend. Will you not immediately Give my love to sister Hannah, and Emily too should you meet with them I should be much gratified to receive letters from them I wish to hear from Cousin Helen Aunt S. and finally all the friends –
From your sincere friend
Lucinda Curtis
Letter to Mrs. Laura J. Little, Sheffield, Berkshire County, Massachusetts, from Lucinda Curtis, Westmoreland, October 12, 1846 — Phillip F. Schlee Collection, Manhattan, Kansas